Information & Support

"Being part of a polygamous marriage, I have no financial independence. My husband controls all our resources. Without my own income, I feel trapped in this life with no way out."

I am Trapped in a Web of Dependency

"Being part of a polygamous marriage, I have no financial independence. My husband controls all our resources. Without my own income, I feel trapped in this life with no way out."

It's hard to admit, but being in a marriage where my husband has multiple wives makes me feel invisible. Even though it's accepted in my community, it doesn't take away the constant feeling that I'm in a competition for his love, for his attention, for a place in his life. Every day feels like a race I'm destined to lose, where my needs and desires are always second to the other wives. I smile on the outside, pretending everything is fine, but inside, my identity is fading, and I am losing myself.

The Fear of Speaking Up

“When I try to express my feelings about my situation, I’m told that I should be grateful for what I have. But how can I feel grateful when I am suffocating?”

Whenever I muster the courage to voice my concerns, I am shut down. They tell me I’m lucky, that I should be thankful for the 'security' my marriage provides. But what security? I have no control over my life. My voice is drowned out, buried beneath a culture that tells me my feelings don’t matter. Each time I attempt to speak up, I'm met with reminders that my role as a wife and mother is the most important thing. The walls close in a little more each day, and I feel as if my worth is tied only to how well I can serve.

• Am I being selfish for wanting to be heard?

• Why can’t I express my feelings without being silenced?

Competing for Love, Losing Myself

"Every day feels like a silent war, a battle for my husband's attention. But in this fight, I always end up feeling like I'm not enough."

The constant rivalry with the other wives eats away at me. I am always looking over my shoulder, wondering if I’m doing enough to earn his love or make him see me.

The insecurity and jealousy between us create an unbearable tension, eroding my spirit day by day. I want to find peace, but how can I when every moment feels like I'm losing a piece of myself?

Walking away seems impossible, as I have no financial means to leave.

Without my own income, I’m dependent on him for everything—my home, my children, even my sense of identity.

• How do I navigate this jealousy and insecurity?

• What if I never feel loved or valued for who I am?

The Weight of Silence

"The cultural expectations make it impossible for me to seek help. I feel powerless, trapped, and voiceless."

The pressure to conform, to stay quiet, to simply endure—it’s suffocating. I know that if I try to resist, express my true feelings, I will be dismissed or ridiculed. The community tells me this is how things have always been, that I should accept my place and stop trying to change it.

But inside, I’m screaming. I want more. I want to break free from this cage, to reclaim my life, but every door seems locked, and I don’t hold the key.

• Is it wrong to want to be free?

• What will happen if I break the silence?

If this sounds familiar, know that you are not alone. You deserve the right to decide your future, and there are resources that can help you reclaim your voice.

The complexities of polygamy can create unique challenges for women, often intertwining stability with the choices made by the men in their lives. You have the right to define what works for you.